| |
| |
|
Coaching Information |
|
|
|
Coaching: Change Made Simple
Here's a story that I think gets at why we have such difficulty with change. I was 8 years old and my parents gave me a dollar to go to the toy store with my best friend and his mom. I found a Frankenstein model that I had been wanting that cost 88 cents, but I put it back on the shelf. When my friend's mom asked me why I put it back, I said because all I had was a dollar, the model cost 88 cents and I didn't want to get in trouble by wasting 12 cents. She then explained to me that if I gave the clerk my dollar, I would be able to get my model and get 12 cents back in change. I thought that was pretty cool and got the model. The point of this silly little story is that until that moment, no one had explained the concept of change to me and therefore I believed I could not get what I wanted. Now I just said all that to be able to introduce you to one of my favorite strategies for coaching people to get the changes they want in their lives. Let's say a person comes in and they want to work on balance in their lives. That's a good thing to want, but how in the world do you take all the tasks and demands of life and manage them, much less balance them? The first step is breaking down this task into manageable pieces. The life balance wheel So picture with me if you will a large circle divided equally into 8 sections, like a piece of pie (you may even want to stop and draw one for yourself). We'll call it our life balance wheel. Each one of these pieces of the wheel represents a part of our lives. I usually divide it into these eight pieces: family, career, finances, personal/spiritual growth, recreation, effectiveness/contribution, friendship and environment. The second step is to rate yourself in each of these areas, using a scale from 1 to 10, where 1 is the worst/lowest possible and 10 is the best/highest possible. Now picture that circle again, and then picture each piece of the pie. As we rate each piece between 1 and 10, we simply place a curved line on the section of pie, where a one would be at the pointed inner piece of the pie and a 10 would be on the curved outer piece of the pie. After we have rated all eight areas, we connect the various curved lines to each other which form a usually very bumpy circle. Now imagine what it would be like to ride in a car with wheels as bumpy and rough as your life balance wheel. Sort of feels like our lives feel sometimes, doesn't it? As a coach, now my job is to help you discover what's most important in your life, what you most want to change, create an action plan to get you there, and then hold you accountable and hold your hand as you achieve the changes you want. The third step is to pick the first area in which you want to work. Let's say it's in your family relationships, that you have rated a 4 and you would like it to be a ten. Going from a 4 to a ten is a pretty big leap, and trying to do it all at once is part of what can make change so difficult at times. So we again break it down into manageable pieces. My next question would be what will it take to go from a 4 to a 5 in the next week before we meet again? A good place to start would be to spend at least 1/2 hour of uninterrupted one on one time with each member of your family. After you have completed this goal and moved from a 4 to a 5, we'll chart a course for moving from 5 to 6. Then later on we'll work on the other seven areas of the wheel. Now these are 8 areas of life that I chose. You can pick whatever 8 areas work for you. What this gives you is a simple yet powerful tool for breaking change done into manageable amounts, and a way to create a clear and detailed map for how to get there. In closing, imagine what your life would be like a year from now if each month you chose one of these areas to work on and improve. My guess is it would be pretty cool. So let's get moving! Visit SecretsofGreatRelationships.com for tips and tools for creating and growing a great relationship. You can also subscribe to our f*r*e*e 10 day e-program on how to enrich your relationship today, from relationship coach and expert Jeff Herring.
MORE RESOURCES:
Coaching - Google News |
|
|
|
RELATED ARTICLES
How to Make $100,000 Dollars as a Personal Trainer - Part A for Attitude! My name is Greg Ryan. For the last twenty years I have counseled thousands of personal trainers, fitness directors and gym owners on how be successful in the health and fitness industry. Are You Controlling or Loving Yourself? How often do you hear a parental voice in your head that says things like, "You've got to lose weight," or "You should get up earlier every morning and exercise," or "Today I should get caught up on the bills," or "I've got to get rid of this clutter." Let's explore what happens in response to this voice. Drop and Gimme Ten! Every one of us have dreams, desires and goals that we put on the shelf. In front of them are a litany of excuses -- but not one reason -- why they aren't being pursued. Ten Benefits of Having a Relationship Coach As a Master Certified Relationship Coach, I work with singles to help them attract a great match and with couples to help put their relationships back on track. I hear great feedback from my clients about the value of coaching. Skills for Change The name of the game is CHANGE -- that's true at work, and it's also true in life. In both situations there are FOUR skills you can trust:1. The Good, The Bad and The Ugly: How Do You Change the World? Recently, I saw an exhibition of paintings by a very talented artist. He clearly has a social conscience and his depictions of the pain and misery of disenfranchised and minority people are so vivid and real you can't help but feel the pain in viewing the paintings. The Problem with Blame? If You Fix the Blame, You Ignore the Problem Have you ever found yourself in a hurry to leave the house for an appointment when you could not find your car keys?Imagine that you and a friend are in a hurry to leave for an important event. You turn over the couch cushions, rifle through the newspapers on the dining room table, search your previous day's pants pockets, and dig through your purse. Coaching for Results He's a very successful sales manger who craves results. He can't be bothered with people who don't produce. Four Common Rapport Building Mistakes and How to Fix Them 1. Pretending You Are Interested When You Are NotDo yourself a favor and be honest with yourself and the people you spend time with. Smelling the Roses: Better Living Through Savoring "Stop and smell the roses," people often say. Then they smile ruefully, because everybody knows there isn't enough TIME to stop or, as my daughter says, to "chill. Dare To Be Inconsistent, Lopsided, And Totally Courageous I was talking to one of my coaching clients and she was talking about not being able to stay with a meditation practice, so she gave up meditating altogether. "I'm either gung ho all the way or I don't show up at all," she said in disgust. Courage and the Agony of Coaching Employees Coaching employees on sensitive and personal topics like performance or contribution to the organization can be as difficult and agonizing as telling a young son or daughter about sex for the first time. You end up playing the same mental games in your head over and over again: "What should they be told? How much do they already know? (Or how much do they want me to think they know?) How much detail should I go into?" If you are unable to answer any of these penetrating questions, you tend to put the task off for another six months. What The Buddha Says About Coaches There is a Buddhist saying that goes like this: "If you meet the Buddha on the road, kill it." This means to kill any concept of the Buddha as something apart from oneself. The Adventure Attitude Of the 60,000 people who lived to be over 100 in the United States in 2002, the single most important characteristic they had in common was their ability to be positive in the face of change. They were able to look at things objectively, put them in perspective and move on. Let's Say You're a Dog. Are You So Competitive You'd Eat a Carrot? Seems like a gal always learns something out on the farm! Yes, it's a farm tale and I'm going to change the names of the animals to protect the guilty!I spent last weekend down in Lower Alabama where my friend from high school owns a farm. On the neighboring property there lives a donkey we'll call "Jake. Do You Really Need A Home Business Mentor? Having a mentor can mean the difference between success and failure if you want to have a successful Internet home business.Many of you have dreamed of owning your own Internet business, and have probably been involved in countless opportunities, and succeeded at none. The Difference Between Approval and Appreciation Having worked with individuals, couples, families and business partners for 35 years, helping them learn to resolve conflict, I have often been faced with the difficulties that occur when people are confused about the difference between approval with appreciation. Have you ever wondered about the difference between approval and appreciation? Most of us have never actually thought about it, yet if we do think about it, we realize that we feel very differently when we receive approval as opposed to receiving appreciation. The Non-Conscious Mind at Work. Harness it for Your Success Thoughts are real things. As soon as you realize how to control your thoughts you are on your way to making vast changes in your daily success. What I Would Include In A Coaching Book A coach is an essential figure in providing direction and leadership to his/her team. In sports, coaches are sometimes evaluated on the number of wins they can produce. Discover The Coach Within You One of the three basic roles of leadership is the coach or mentor. The best boss is often the best coach.
|
| home | site map |
| © 2006 |
