| |
| |
|
Parenting Information |
|
|
|
Parenting Your Teenager: Teens and Violence
I have a bit of a different response than most therapists to the often asked question: "How can all this teen violence be happening?" My questions are: "How could this not be happening" and "Why doesn't it happen even more often?" Here's what I mean by these questions - although there are many more factors involved, just consider these three: 1) kids listen to increasingly violent music, see increasingly violent movies and TV shows, and play increasingly violent video games. All of these without any focus on the real life, long term consequences of violence. 2) kids have more and more easy access to weapons that can maim and kill 3) more and more kids get no moral education, and walk around with an underdeveloped conscious at best, and at worst, no conscious at all. It doesn't take a rocket scientist or a psychologist to get it that these three ingredients alone are a prescription for disaster. Warning signs No one really knows exactly why one kid will snap and another one won't. At the same time, here a few warning signs for parents and others to watch for: a history and enjoyment of violent behavior an inability to feel and/or show remorse excessive fascination with violent video games and movies easy access to weapons little or no parental/adult supervision little or no impulse control recent rejections, disappointments or loss of hope violent and/or suicidal thoughts, threats or other speech the loss of someone close, either through death, a move, or a break up a friend or someone they look up to taking a recent violent action Again, it's important to remember that kid A could have most or all of these signs and become violent, while kid B could have the same signs and not go off. The most important question to answer, I believe, is what can we do to prevent this kind of stuff in our kids. Here are a few suggestions: Know your kid's world. I realize every parent thinks they know the world of their kid, but do you really? Do you know what kind of lyrics and music is going into their brains all day? Have you looked at the lyrics? Do you know what games they play, what movies they watch? Are you sure? The reason I am so adamant about this is I believe that if enough parents really knew what was going on out there, the stuff I hear every day, there would be some type of revolution. In the words of Crosby, Stills, Nash and Young, "teach your children well." Teach them: when someone is beaten up or severely hurt, it takes a long time to heal, physically and emotionally when someone is killed, they are gone, do not come back, and people grieve their loss if you get hit like guys get hit on TV wrestling, you don't get up, you go to the hospital how to problem solve without violence what to do with the anger and rage we all experience. And last but not least, run, don't walk, to your nearest bookstore and pick up a copy of Stephen Glenn's book "Raising Self-Reliant Children in a Self-Indulgent World." In it you will find the results of Glenn's research into the problems of youth, the Significant Seven Factors that separate high risk kids from low risk kids and how to encourage them in your family. Visit SecretsofGreatRelationships.com for tips and tools for creating and growing a great relationship. You can also subscribe to our f*r*e*e 10 day e-program on how to enrich your relationship today, from relationship coach and expert Jeff Herring.
MORE RESOURCES:
Parenting - Google News |
|
|
|
RELATED ARTICLES
Top Ten Common Sense Rules for Fathers There are a lot of sophisticated parenting theories and techniques out there. Many of them are widely used and treated as the gospel. Introduction to the Medications Used in the Treatment of Attention Deficit Disorder There are several treatment options available to help improve the symptoms of Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder. Since there is no prescription medicine that can "cure" for ADHD, the various medical interventions seek to improve symptoms. The Homeopathic Nutraceutical Attend as an Alternative to Ritalin You no longer have to use Ritalin or other stimulants to treat ADHD. You no longer have to consider anti-depressants as the alternative to stimulants. End Homework Battles Ask parents what their biggest school year challenge is, and you'll likely hear that it is the difficulty they face in getting their kids to do homework. With so many other attractive ways for kids to spend their time, getting them to buckle down and complete that extra bit of schoolwork can be like pulling teeth. Intermission: Wood Chips I wanted to share with you one of the most valuable lessons my daughter taught me when she was sixteen-months-old. I call this essay, "Cherish Your Wood Chips. Ten Tips for a Great First Day of School! Many children are jittery on the first day of school. Listed are ways to prepare your child for the big day!-Read books about school. How To Help Your Child Learn Just as every snowflake is unique, so is every child. The way that your child learns depends a number of different factors, which combined together, create his unique learning style. Just Average What do you mean average? Not good? Just doing good enough?That's what came out in Joshua's report card recently. Looking back, I wasn't too bright a child either. Toilet Terrors And Other Potty Training Fears Potty training fears, often called toilet terrors, are common among toddlers and small children. Look at things from your child's perspective. Is it ADHD or Bi-Polar Disorder? Bi-Polar Disorder, or Manic Depression, is characterized by mood swings, sometimes extreme, ranging from depressed to normal moods, or from depressed to manic episodes. Manic behaviors are often very similar to "hyperactive" behaviors, including motor restlessness, irritability, temper outbursts, sleeping less, or having higher levels of energy. Gifts From The Heart: Moms Remember... To the untrained eye, it might look like a piece of bubble gum stuck to a safety pin; a pink chewed mass mistakenly rescued from the trash years before. However, to its owner, this cherished keepsake is a bejeweled treasure-still worn with extreme pride. Overscheduled Kids Time devoted the better part of an issue to it. Newsweek featured an article titled "Busy Around the Clock. What To Do With A 6 Year Old Smart Mouth Know It All Just the other day, I was talking to some other stay at home moms and asked if they were struggling with any difficulties. "Yes," one piped up almost immediately, "discipline problems with my 6 year old smart mouth know-it-all! I don't want to spank, and don't, but he seems to laugh at time out, privilage loss, etc. Hearing Our Seriously Distressed Adolescents The distressed adolescent often has feelings of abandonment, emotional detachment, withdrawal, and isolation. These children begin to develop an intense anger directed towards an adult society that they feel has hurt them and does not understand them. Get Down (On The Floor!) And Play With Your Children When was the last time you and your kids rolled around on the floor together laughing yourselves silly? If you're like me, it may have been a while! Sometimes I get caught up in household chores, give errands a priority or answer the phone when I know I should let it ring, instead of making time for my two daughters. It's not that I don't play with them; just the opposite is true. Television - The Great SATAN! I've often thought that in 6 million years, archaeologists will marvel at the devotion the 21st century Earthlings had to their household gods. Excavation will show these deities in virtually every home, obviously objects of devotion, the focal point in a room. A Good Preschool Idea The successful preschool idea behind many successful preschool learning centers is thorough all round planning and well-chosen staff members. Any preschool idea that does not begin with sound financial planning and in-depth budgeting knowledge will probably fail. How Public Schools Assault Parents Values Is there anything wrong with lying, cheating, stealing, shop-lifting, taking drugs, premarital sex, insulting your parents, pornography, irresponsibility, or getting pregnant in junior high school? Not according to the values taught to children in many public schools today.From the earliest times in America, teachers have believed that schools should teach moral values. Parenting - Give Your Child The Tools To Build Strong Character And Values There are many parenting styles. Yours may be very different from your own parents, your siblings, or your neighbors. Child Communication Skill: Do You Really Know What Your Child Is Saying To You? Here's the scene of communication with your child: your three-year-old boy is bawling his eyes out. Hurriedly, you run over, and ask "What's wrong?".
|
| home | site map |
| © 2006 |